How To Improve Your Confidence
Warning : Long Post - Not for anyone who has an
attention span below 5 minutes.
There’s
a thin line between confidence and delusionment, and i think it’s fair to say
that at times i lean towards the latter. But then again, i’m so confident with
myself i simply overwrite that thought. -grins. All of us struggle with the
issue of confidence in various parts of our lives, whether it’s going to have
lunch alone or thinking you’re not good looking enough. Well, today i’m going
to help you improve your confidence to a level that hovers just below arrogance
-winks.
Change Your Thinking, Blablabla GET REAL
I’m
not going to tell you how to change your mentality to believing you’re a better
person and all that crap, or change your beliefs and your heart. It’s all a
load of bull and nothing gets solved in the end. I’m here to give you the real
stuff on how to improve your confidence. First, let me share with you some
insecurities and confidence struggles i USED to have.
I
used to be worried of going to the canteen and eating lunch or dinner alone, or
rather, i was always worried i wasn’t part of the popular group and hated to be
left alone hanging out with no one. But that’s all changed now. I TRIED to
change my mindset and okay, it may have worked a tiny bit in convincing
myself that i shouldn’t conform to social pressures, but the huge part of it
was.. practice. Yes, practice. To overcome this fear and lack of confidence i
have in myself of always conforming to the norms of society, i decided that i
have to do it the right way – the tough way -.
I started forcing myself to go for lunch alone and sit in the
middle of the crowd and keep my head up, i didn’t follow any groups if they
didn’t go the direction i wanted to, if i was in a group, it was simply because
i was leading it and going to where i want. Trust me, it wasn’t easy the first
5000 times, i kept tilting my head down while eating dinner and looking over my
shoulder when leading a group of people. Oh, it was tough.
But
after 5000 tries, i’ve finally got so used to it that my mindset is tuned to
it. I willingly go to have lunch and dinner alone when i missed out on the
lunch crowd because i overslept at my office table ( i don’t purposely ditch
lunch with my friends, i’m not a hermit), i leave a group without hesitation if
they’re not traveling to the same destination as me and i walk in front of
groups of people with an air of confidence in where i’m the direction i’m
leading them to (even if i have no idea, of course everyone will just discover
we’re lost at a later time, but oh well!).
Basically, all in all, after much PRACTICE, i have
overcame my fear and lack of confidence in myself which resulted to me
conforming to society’s norms in the past. Amazing eh?
So, What Do You Do?
Simple,
start making a list, yes a list, a mental one would be good enough of course,
of which department your lack of confidence resides, whether in your appearance
or as a leader, and PRACTICE. Alright, you may think for areas such as
appearance, you can’t practice at all BUT YOU’RE WRONG. You practice going to
the gym to get a figure, you practice discipline in taking care of your diet,
you practice discipline in maintaining your looks, you practice initiative in
looking for the best fashion for yourself. For every insecurity you have,
practice can help you overcome it.
For
every insecurity, there comes a solution you have to brainstorm for (it won’t
come easily to you) that with enough practice, will either change your entire
mindset properly or change your entire being completely that would triumph over
your lack of confidence in that area.
Sounds Deep? Hell Yeah It Is!
All
my brain juices got drained dry just coming up with this entire post. Phew,
tiring stuff.
Anyway, ANNOUNCEMENT.
Remember to join Loveawake Newly
Launched Forum, it’s growing in size lately
but it certainly would be a lot nicer if everyone joined. The community is a
place where we all can discuss the various issues that bugs us of our dating
and relationship lives. A lovely place to throw all your burdens at and an even
better place to whine about your day (i do that quite often) (:
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